Starting Over After Losing Your Cat

By Linda Brandon, CCS advisory board member

I am often saddened when people who have lost a beloved pet cat say they cannot bear the pain of adopting a new cat or kitten. It seems they are missing the joy of giving a new cat a home. It is possible to form a wonderful bond with a new cat. Every cat is different, but they will still hold a special place in your heart.

I have two cats now who are beloved family members. One cat never replaces another; however, they do present the opportunity for a new bond of love and friendship. Lilyana Bella Marie Rose is 16 years young and came from the Longmont Humane Society. We had just lost Monet at the age of 20+ years. Monet could not be replaced, but Lilyana has become a constant companion and dear friend. She follows me everywhere and is a lap cat.

Douglas Tyler Thomas Milsybops came from CCS as a kitten seven years ago, after we sadly lost Tyler Vaughn Tipperary from complications of colon cancer. Tyler was also from CCS, where he crawled up my chest and wrapped himself around my neck in the shelter. Tyler was strictly my cat, soul mate and life partner. He tolerated my husband Mark, but he let him know that he was there first. Tyler came after our cat Justin died of old age.

I was sure I would never be as close to Douglas as I had been to Tyler. Douglas is his own man while taking on many characteristics of Tyler and another cat, Miles Milsybops. Douglas has become a snuggler like Miles. He currently sleeps on top of me or beside me every night. He warms my feet when he lays with me on the sofa. Douglas loves both of us but leans toward his momma. He had Tyler’s stoic loyalty and is always glad to see me.

He and Lilyana slowly developed a strong bond, even though she did not like him at first. All he wanted was a friend and a playmate. They now snuggle up together at the fireplace and on the sofa. We call it canoodling. It is good to see their bond is strong even though there is an age difference.

In a very short time, my brother and his wife, my nephew, and my niece all lost beloved cats. They said they could not bear the loss of losing one more. They even talked each other out of starting over with another cat. Finally, my niece did a great thing — she adopted an older cat. She knew everyone wanted a kitten, but she felt a more mature cat would fit their lifestyle.

Contessa, nicknamed Tessa, turned out to be a wonderful cat. She had a few minor behavioral issues, which were easily corrected with a cat therapist. She has brought so much joy to their home. She goes to the cat spa when they go on vacation.

My sister and her husband live on a ranch. So many cats enrich their lives as they provide attention, food, shelter and water. Two cats, Winnie and Wanda, live in a heated barn. They just recently brough a ginger cat, Missy, into their home. She provides constant delight and companionship. She just came walking down the road one day and found her way inside. Miracles do happen.

This article would not be complete if I did not mention that some people should not adopt. If you cannot provide a safe, primarily indoor existence for a cat, you might reconsider adopting. Many people adopted cats during COVID and returned them when they went back to the office. A cat needs shelter, companionship (to a degree), food, water, toys and a litterbox. Most can be left alone while you go to work or other places. They do need you to pay attention to them and make them feel special when you are home. It is too hard on the cat if these needs cannot be met. Please also consider how your current pets would react to a new family member.